I. TIME FOR RELAXATION
Next SectionUnitl the war broke out,
I had never been given enough time for unhurried
relaxation, I had never enjoyed real vacation.
Life was not easy during my early years.
I first went to
school when I was five and was preoccupied with
my schooling until I was 18. By then I had
recieved a diploma from the Philippine Normal
School, now the Philippine Normal University,
certifying that I was graduate of the two-year
normal course for teachers. This was an
impressive qualification then, unlike today when
most public school teachers are holders of
bachelor's, masteral or even doctoral degrees. At
that time many teachers were not even high school
graduates. It was not surprising, therefore, when
after teaching Grade III in Baao Central School
for one year and Grade VII in Pili Central School
the next year, I became the youngest public
elementary school principal in Camarines Sur when
I was 20. I was assigned to the sleepy town of
Gainza, and I was there when war broke out.
When I started
schooling, Spare the rod and spoil
the child was still a basic rule of
pedagogy. A parent would often tell the teacher,
"Maestra, the flesh of this child is yours,
his bones are mine." In effect, the parent
was telling the teacher that she could employ
corporal punishment on the child whenever
necessary. Unfortunately, many of our teachers
took advantage of this permission given to them
by custom too harsh and too often despite the
official injunction against it.
For example, in
the catolico class, which was the
nearest equivalent of our prep and kindergarten
today, I had a very strict teacher who believed
that not learning one's lesson was a punishable
offense. When we arrived in school, which means
the small house of our teacher, we would shout to
no one in particular, "Buenas tardes,"
then take our seats on the hard bamboo floor. Our
main activity was to prepare for the leccion
or oral examination period by reading in a sing-song
voice "d,a,da,d,e,de,d,o,do,d,u,du"
or whatever our assignement might be, the louder,
the better. Then it would be time for the oral
examination. We would be called one by one to
stand by the teacher's chair and read aloud our
lessons. Those who passed the examination by not
making too many mistakes in their reading would
be given a new assignment for the next session.
Those who failed would have the same assignment.
That is why whenever we arrived home from school,
the usual question our elders would ask us was
"Ono ika ibinalyo." If our
answer should happen to be no, we would be
scolded for being dull or lazy.
My next teacher
in the next catolico
class had the habit of ordering one of the older
boys just before the start of the leccion period
to gather some tough twigs from the scrubs
growing nearby to be made into a switch. He held
the switch while conducting the oral examinations.
When a pupil made a mistake while reading he
might be whipped or made to lie face down on the
floor and continue reading so that the next time
he made a mistake the switch could be applied at
once on his buttocks. One classmate who was dull
and over-age was usually ordered to lie down on
the floor at once before he began to read his
lessons because, the teacher said, he would be
sure to make a mistake anyway. As a consequence,
the poor fellow always made mistakes because his
attention would be partly on the book he was
holding and partly on the ever ready switch held
by the teacher.
I knew other
teachers who were quick to use the rod in order
not to spoil the child. That is why it is not
unusual, especially just after the opening of
classes to see a parent beating his child with a
stick and forcibly escorting him to school.
School time was not a time to relax. Going to
school was not something we look forward to with
pleasure.
When I became a
teacher myself, I soon realized that a teacher's
work is never done. Even during the summer months
which are supposed to be vacation time, I was
always utilized by my principal and my supervisor
to help them in their work. I did not complain
because I knew that one way to get promoted is to
walk the proverbial extra mile. That is why when
war broke out in 1941 I realized that for the
first time I had enough time to relax, that I was
having the first real vacation in my adult life.
II.
NOT TOO PRO-AMERICAN
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I think another
reason why I enjoyed the war years was that I was
not too pro-American. Like most Filipinos, I
wanted the Americans to win. But I harbored no
illusions about them and their coming to the
Philippines. I knew only too well that they were
not the completely unselfish benefactors of the
Filipinos, not our brother Americans some people
would make us believe them to be.
The Filipino
forces defeated the Spaniards in the Philippines
20 years before I was born. Aguinaldo was
supposed to have obtained the help on the
Americans for this purpose. But the Filipinos
would have overthrown the oppressive Spanish rule
even without American help. Yet in the Treaty of
Paris that ended the Spanish-American War, it
appeared as if the Americans should be credited
principally with defeating the Spanish forces in
the Philippines. The Filipino envoys to the
treaty negotiations were ignored. By the terms of
the treaty, the Philippines was ceded to the
United States for US $20 million. This was
tantamount to selling what does not belong to the
sellers. Spain had no more right to sell our
country to anybody because we had already won our
independence from her with the blood of our
heroes.
The Filipinos
had no choice but to try to protect their hard-earned
independence against the Americans in what we
call the Filipino-American War and what the
Americans choose to call the Philippine
Insurrection. In fact it was neither a war nor an
insurrection, it was a massacre. The Americans
were too well-armed and too many. That is why at
Tirad Pass the dashing Gregorio del Pilar and his
men were killed to the last man without any
American casualties. So no matter how unfair it
was, the Philippines became an American colony.
As has often been said, might makes right; or, as
they say it in Baao, Oda matanos sa raog.
Of course we
have to admit that the American occupation was
not without its blessings. For example, it made
our country a democracy just as the Spanish
occupation made the Philippines a Christian
country. The Americans also gave us the English
language and the American system of education
that made the Filipino a true cosmopolite, at
home anywhere in the world. But the American
occupation could not make us Americans or the
brother of Americans despite the contention of
some that we would have been much better off if
the Philippines had become another star in the
Star-Spangled Banner. And we cannot forget that
the Americans came to our country against our
will and not for purely altruistic motives.
III.
NOT TOO ANTI-JAPANESE
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Soon after the
outbreak of the war stories began to circulate
about Japanese atrocities. We heard about
tortures and executions of suspected anti-Japanese.
We heard about the Death March, the concentration
camps and the maltreatment of prisoners. On May
12, 1942 Buhi was bombed by Japanese planes
because of guerilla activities here. Our big
house in San Buenaventura was burned to the
ground and my elder brother almost died from a
gaping shrapnel wound on his thigh and extensive
burns on his body. One time we received a warning
that the Japanese were about to arrest So San Co
and So Son Kua, two Chinese friends of my father
who had come with us to our evacuation place. I
was forced to take my sisters, Conching and Nena,
to Itbog at midnight in our very small banca with
only my youngest brother, Jim, to help me. We
were afraid we might meet the Japanese so we
stopped now and then for the sound of paddles.
All these were not pleasant things to contemplate.
However, just as
I knew that the Americans were not always right,
I also knew that the Japanese were not always
wrong. An example of this was the sneak attack on
Pearl Harbor on what Franklin D. Roosevelt called
the "Day of Infamy." But the Japanese
militarists believed that this was a matter of
necessity to them as it was the only way Japan
could have a chance of defeating the admittedly
superior American forces, and any way, all is
fair in love and war.
One time I asked
a friend and apparently well-educated Japanese
sergeant if it was true that Philadelphia had
already been bombed. I doubted this bit of rumor
because if it were true, it would mean that the
attacking Japanese planes had flown east from the
Pacific Coast across the whole continental United
States. The sergeant first looked around to make
sure that nobody else could hear him then he
placed his forearm beside mine and said, "Look,
you and I, brothers, not white like Americans.
But I tell you Japan cannot win; America too
strong."
Perhaps another
reason why I did not hate the Japanese too much
was because it happened that the only Japanese I
personally encountered were not the monsters some
people pictured them out to be. The nearest to a
cruel act by a Japanese that I saw was that of a
non-commissioned officer whipping a private with
a leather belt because of some minor complaint
made against the private by a Filipino woman. I
talked with a certain Lieutenant Papaya who told
me that he was a dentistry student at Tokyo
Imperial University from which he was taken to a
troop ship that took him to the Philippines. He
had not even been allowed to say good-bye to his
parents. Captain Ishibashi, at one time the
highest-ranking Japanese officer in Buhi, was a
highly cultured person who could dance superbly
and sing English songs with hardly a trace of
Japanese accent and without changing the l
sounds to r
as many Japanese do because their alphabet does
not contain the letter l.
And I also noticed that many of the Japanese
enlisted men were wearing uniforms that had been
darned so many times they seemed ready to fall
apart. I saw how meager their rations were. I
remembered these poor soldiers when after the war
I saw the fat and healthy Japanese POW'S at the
American camp in Iriga.
I was convinced
from the beginning that the war was one between
the Americans and the Japanese. The Americans
should be thankful that the Filipinos were so
loyal to them unlike the Indonesians who did not
have the same feelings toward their former Dutch
masters and no matter how much I wanted the
Americans to win, I never came to the point of
thinking that the war was our war and that an
American victory would be our victory.
IV.
TIME FOR READING AND WRITING
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I have one vice
which I feel I could not do without. Reading. I
must read everday just as my brother Abraham must
smoke his expensive, imported aromatic tobacco
everday. When he smokes his pipe there is such a
pleasant aroma that I like to sit near him even
if I do not smoke myself. My advantage over him
is that I do not have to spend so much on my vice.
He must have spent a fortune on his.
My problem,
however, is that since I fell in love with
reading when I was six, I never seemed to have
enough time for it. In the intermediate grades I
was probably the only pupil in the whole
intermediate department who borrowed books
regularly from our little school library. Miss
Amparo Mirando, our librarian, must have
considered me some sort of nuisance. One time she
told her pupil assistant, "Ta iton na
man si Benjamin. pa soblia na iyan ta di na man
iyan mag alin siton."
When I was in
high school, I usually had four library books at
home, two from our school library and two from
the public library. I was such an avid reader
that I once tried to read two books at the same
time. (It cannot be done.) I would read
at twilight. I would read by the flickering light
of one-centavo candle. I even read by the light
of the moon. My elders warned me that I was
ruining my eyesight. But while I had to use
glasses for reading when I reached 40, since I
reached 70 and until now I read without glasses
anymore even at night. I am inclined to believe
that even habitual reading in a dim light does
not affect one's eyesight at all.
When war came, I
suddenly found that I had all the time I wanted
for reading. My eldest brother, Abraham, whom we
sometimes refer to as Patriarch, after his
Biblical namesake, had bought shortly before the
war broke out a set of thick giant books
containing the complete works of such literary
greats as Shakespeare, Maupasant, Emerson,
Flaubert, Dostoevsky, Ibsen, Tolstoy, Poe,
Kipling and others. I read and re-read these
books so many times during the war that I must
have acquired more than the equivalent of an
ordinary college education.
I had become
such a proficient reader that when after the war
I went back to college to work for my B.SE. Ll.B,
and M.A. degrees, I had a decided advantage over
the ordinary student. I was oftern the only one
in our law class who could complete the long
library reading assignments because I could read
so fast. And when I was reviewing for the bar, my
landlady told me that many student reviewing for
board and bar examinations had stayed at her
house but I was the only one who never went to
bed later than 10:00 p.m. It would be difficult
to find someone who has obtained college degrees
with seemingly less effort than I.
The war years
also gave me all the time I wanted for writing,
an activity I enjoy almost as much as I enjoy
reading. Every time my family would go to the
poblacion, I was the one left behind as our
evacuation place. I did not mind being left alone
because I had my reading and writing to keep me
occupied and I had always rather enjoyed solitude
anyway.
I did a lot of
writing during the war, both prose and poetry,
However, I never cared much whether my writing
was published or not. In 1968, on an impulse, I
sent a story that had been lying in my drawer for
years to the Philippine Free Press. Usually a
writer receives many rejection slips before he
gets published for the first time and I was
expecting to receive one. But my story "Dance Weirldly, My Love" was accepted at
once and published without any editing. It was
the last time I had a piece of writing published,
until my nephew, Elmer Sergio, asked me to write
something for his KJS publication.
As far as I am
concerned, the act of creating a story, an essay
or a poem is pleasure and satisfaction enough. It
must be true that creation is always pleasurable.
That is why when I retired from regular
employment 15 years ago at the rather early age
of 60 and some friends predicted that I would get
bored to death, I just smiled. I knew that their
dire prediction would never happen so long as I
had some nice books and periodicals to read and
paper and pen for writing.
V.
TIME FOR FISHING AND FARMING
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One time during
the war, Father asked me what was the best thing
to do with the war going on and no immediate end
to the hostilities in sight. I replied that the
only thing to do was take good care of our health
and wait for the war to end. Then he asked what
about getting some money from our palay, coconuts,
fish and other products that our family could not
consume. I replied that it was not important. I
was sure that the 'Mickey Mouse' money that the
Japanese were forcing us to use would be
valueless after the war except in the extremely
remote possibility of Japan emerging victorious.
In fact when the war ended, a rich man in Buhi
nearly went crazy trying to find out what to do
with the several petroleum cans of 'Japanese
money' he had hoarded.
Since our
evacuation place in Comagaca was by the
shores of Lake Buhi, Father decided that we catch
fish at least for our own consumption. I was
delighted for I had always been a devotee of the
sport of Izaak Walton. Father asked his compadre,
Menes Merilles, to teach us how to catch fish by tambong.
We also caught fish by hook and line, by dip net
and even with our bare hands during canoba
when the waters of the lake became sulphurous and
the fish became groggy. We soon became such
expert fishermen that we caught morrethan we
could possibly consume. We caught pleanty of fish
for the mere pleasure of catching them. I do not
remember that we sold any of our catch.
A similar thing
happened with our farming. We already had plenty
of coconuts and palay. But we also planted and
produce plenty of camotes, pineapple,
pechay, tomatoes and other crops. I learned how
to gather tuba from our coconut trees
and we enjoyed drinking the tinamis or
sweet tuba. What we could not consume, we placed
in big jars and it became first-class vinegar
after a month. I remember that when we availed of
the services of my cousin, Dr. Honorato Fabul, we
just gave him tuba and vinegar because
he would not have accepted cash anyway.
VI.
I FIND A WIFE
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Perhaps the
principal reason why the war years were the
happiest in my life was that they brought me my
wife. Even if the other reasons did not exist,
this alone would have been sufficient to make the
war years the happiest years in my life.
On Valentine's
Day in 1942, Antonia the only child of Pablo
Sabinorio, a well-to-do businessman and
politician, held a birthday party and dance at
the old Gabaldon-type school building located
where the new municipal building now stands.
Helping her manage the affair was Paching
Tayag,
who later became my sister-in-law. I had few
friends and acquaintances in Buhi then because I
had been studying and working most of the time in
other places. Antonia and I were only nodding
acquaintances. I was probably invited to her
party because of Paching whom I had known since
our primary school days.
During the dance,
Paching devised a Valentine game. Hearts were cut
out of white cardboard and a Valentine message or
joke was written on each. Then the hearts were
irregularly cut in two and one half of each heart
was given to a boy and the other half to a girl.
Then the boy recepients went around to look for
the girls holding the corresponding halves of
their hearts.
In a short time
I located my partner whom I had not known before.
I felt that it would be too embarrasing for me to
ask her to tell me her name. So I asked a friend
and he told me that she was Atang Bernardino and
that she probably knew me already as she was the
friend of my socialite brothers, Abring and
Basting, my other brother Jim being too young to
be seriously interested in girls at that time.
Soon afterwards,
a cousin came to me and begged me to exchange his
half of a cardboard heart with mine. He refused
to tell me the reason for his request. I told him
that I had already found my partner and that she
was a girl I had not known before, so it would be
most ungentlemanly of me to exchange her for
another partner.
A few minutes
later, Paching announced that there would be a
special dance piece exclusively for the partners,
but that they would first parade around the hall.
Only when we were going around the hall in pairs
did I learn why my cousin had tried to exchange
partners with me. He could not have been taller
than Health Secretary Juan Flavier but had had
the ill luck to get as his partner the tallest
girl in the group. She was so tall she was often
jokingly called Tocon or beanpole.
After the dance,
I escorted my partner to her home at the foot of
Malancao Hill. We seemed to like each other from
the moment we first met. I found out that in many
ways she was different from any of the girls I
had previously known. For one thing she was a
good listener and she did not talk about the
usual topics girls prefer such as boyfriends,
girlfriends, clothes, movie stars and parties.
She had no pretentions whatsoever. She was not
afraid to be herself. One time while I was on my
way to visit her I found her fetching water from
a public pump well some distance from her house.
Another girl in her place might have nearly died
from embarassment, but she acted as if it was the
most natural thing in the world for us to help
carry the heavy can of water to her house and
have a nice chat along the way. She was
absoloutely honest. Until now, 50 years later, I
have never found her maliciously telling a
deliberate lie.
A few weeks
later, we the officers of the ronda or
watchmen who had been organized to help maintain
peace and order in the town, decided to hold an
officer's ball. I was picked to manage the affair,
and I agreed on condition that each officer would
invite and bring to the dance only one girl.
Someone objected that we could not do that in
Buhi because here when you invite a girl to a
party or dance, you address your invitation to
her parents "and family". I answered
that I knew of no rule which says that a boy
cannot invite a particular girl to a simple dance.
When my suggestion was accepted, I wrote the
following poem:
Below
the Western Hill
Has gone to rest the silver moon,
Now all is dark and still
And peaceful in the sleeping town
And
while I sing of you
Out here in the dark and the cold,
I think once more of all
The sorrows and the joys of old.
Is
it your face I dimly see
In the dark where night winds blow?
Is it your voice I faintly hear
From the stillness whispering low?
I
mind no more the lonliness
And the cold; my heart is free.
I may be far away from you
But you're dreaming, dear, of me.
At first I
thought of making the title, "Below Malancao
Hill" but I realized it would be too obvious
whom I meant. I took the poem to my friend , the
very able musician Martin P. Ailes, and asked him
to set it to music. Then I went to Atang's house
to ask her to be my partner.
The scheduled
dance had become the talk of the town. Of course
all the eligible young ladies wanted to be
invited to such an exclusive affair, the first of
its kind in Buhi. Not to be invited was a major
dissappointement to some of the girls but of
course it was not their fault that there happened
to be no ronda officer who wanted to
invite them. I found out later that my intended
partner had already been invited by two ronda
officers. She should have accepted one of them as
she had no reason to expect me to invite her. We
were just new friends. But some hidden instinct
must have prompted her to wait for me. She
accepted my invitation at once.
Contrary to the
dire predictions of some and the sourgrapings of
the others especially among the girls unlucky
enough not to have been invited, our dance was a
complete success. "Below the Western Hill"
was played by the orchestra for our special piece
and sung by a trio of the best male singers in
Buhi: Luis Feced, Salvador Tayag and Eulogio
Demagante.
After the dance,
people were convinced that Atang and I had been
sweethearts for a long time or else why should I
have written a song especially for her? Nobody
would believe that we were just friends. But as
they say, fate is fate, que sera, sera. We could
not wait for the war to end before getting
married.
That was half a
century ago and many things have happened since
then. But the war years will remain the happiest
years in my life and without doubt, also in Atang's
life, and "Below the Western Hill" will
always remain to be our song.
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